18 Months of Nursing Milestone!

I am so excited to write that we have made it to the 18 month milestone of nursing.

I am so proud knowing that I have given Dalia the very best for so long. Breastfeeding was a goal of mine, and then making it to 6 months, and then 1 year. My main support has been my own tenacity and empowerment through knowledge and research. Being educated is a girl's best weapon! I also don't care what other people think about it, and that always helps!

Dalia only really nurses in the mornings now, but she loves starting her day with a snuggle in mommy's bed. And some people might think this is odd, but in fact my mom's group has several mothers (pregnant and not) who are currently nursing--it isn't a "weird" momma group either. We were brought together by zip code through an organization called Moms Club. Oh, and everyone in my group has a 18 month old. Oh, and there are former lawyers, yoga instructors, health professionls... you get my drift, right?

18 months have gone by so incredibly fast. And though she may look and act like a big girl, she is still a little one in my eyes!

Up Down and Potty Party!

Some people might think potty training a 1 year old is totally nuts, but in many parts of the world, early potty training, or a similar concept, elimination communication, is pretty much standard practice (though ERers don't like the word "train"). And while we aren't die hard ECers who started at birth, we are introducing Dalia to the potty and letting her use it when we think she needs to. She is an active participant in this process, saying "pee" when she successfully went in the little potty today (for the third time this week). This is not rocket science, people. Sure it takes a long time, but, what else do I have to do? It is like learning how to breast feed, learning how to eat, crawl and walk.

TMI?

I guess some may think so, but this is a place where we shares the trials and tribulations of being new-ish parents. So if you aren't interested fast forward! But I have to warn ya, the first photo is a good one, if you can recognize the main event.

Now, of course we took privacy into account. I bet Dalia is going to LOVE this one day:

We are also going to invest in the snap on toilet. Anyone know of an elmo one? Oh and we spared most viewers the actual potty photo, but some chosen

unlucky family members were not spared.

So for those of you who are interested in trying this or just plain confused/shocked/perplexed here are some helpful websites, interesting stuff

Some EC links:

EC community

Nappy Free video

Helpful tidbits

EC clothing/potty pants

In action #1

In action #2

If my mom didn't already think I was an insane hippy-leaning weirdo, she certainly does now :) We will obviously still be using our amazing stash of cloth diapers for some time, but we are still moving toward a diaper free Dalia.

I thought I would also share a couple of cute Dalia playing photos:

Kuddos to Grandma for picking out this sweet riding toy. Dalia loves it!

Dalia is a ball of fun these days and she loves to play. She LOVES to play "up down" at all hours, including dinner time (and at three am).

Check out this video of Dalia playing "up down" with daddy:

Oh and that frame on the wall that still has the original packaging?

Yep, that is major class right there.

Ciao!

Up and Down, Parenting Dos

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You may notice that we don't yet have any baby gates up. Yes, even on the (few) stairs. In a lot of ways, this is one example of how our parenting style is a little different from the norm.

One thing that is important to us is using the word "no" extremely sparingly. When a child hears the word no a zillion times a day, it not only means less each time you say it, it also emphasizes the behaviors you don't want to highlight. Children are also notorious for imitating their parents--so, you guessed it, you say no a million trillion times all day long, your child will also say no back to you. It all boils down to respectful discipline and understanding that your child is her own person. We treat Dalia with respect as we would any other human being. We treat other children with respect because they are human beings. And in the end, we want Dalia to treat herself with respect, her parents with respect, and other human beings (and animals) with respect.

Three words: empathy, compassion, and respect.

These are the core values of our little family of three.

So we let her climb the stairs. She did fall down and she was very scared, but that is ok. I was there for her and she learned that sitting on stairs doesn't work. I do not let her climb on the stairs when I am not looking, but I don't jump up and say NO NO NO DANGEROUS, because climbing stairs is an important skill. And she felt empowered when she accomplished it!

We have said no to Dalia basically one time. And now at 12 1/2 months, she never ever touches electrical cords. In fact, they are abound in our home and she crawls right past them. I no longer get nervous, though I watch her. She looks at me sometimes (and acknowledges that touching it would be a no no). It isn't about changing your whole world so your child is always protected, it is about teaching your child right from wrong.

It is about teaching your child to make the right decisions. And we value Dalia making her own decisions because we know that she is (with guidance) capable of learning and growing without too much intervention.

Natural Childbirth Birth Plan

We meant to post our birth plan in honor of Dalia's 1st birthday. We didn't quite make it in time, but still want to share it with our readers. This is a fairly typical birth plan for women planning to labor in a birth center or hospital with midwives. There are some doctors out there who would probably be OK with some of these items, but most (if not all) will not agree to this type of plan (especially since most hospitals have procedures, time lines, and other birth policies they must always follow--hello, Business of Being Born, ever see it? It is a MUST)!

How about the you must dilate one cm per hour once you hit active labor or BOOM pitocin (you know the drill, the all-to-familiar cascade of interventions.....)

Having a natural and gentle birth (calm environment, soft music and soft voices, and gentle language and movements) can lead to a more bonded relationship with your child, not to mention it gives you a head start on gentle discipline, if you are interested in that.

So here you all go! And, if you haven't read our very abbreviated birth story, read it here.

Sarah and Steven Horowitz, Birth Plan

Birth Goal

We are attempting to have a natural, unmedicated birth without unnecessary intervention. We understand that emergencies occur and alterations to this plan may be medically necessary, but we would like to discuss alternatives and consequences of any deviation privately.

Hospital Labor Goals

We ask that our Midwife and Doula (Aimee Clark) be present for the labor. We do not want mother and father to be separated at any time during labor or delivery. All other visitors, family, and unnecessary staff should be turned away until we have had time alone with our new baby.

We ask that lights be kept fully dim, noise and voices be kept to a minimum, and the door always be kept closed for privacy. We will bring our own music to aid in natural healing.

We ask that cervical exams be kept to an absolute minimum and that fetal monitoring be intermittent rather than continuous.

We ask that the hospital staff refrain from offering pain medication at all times.

We ask that no routine IV be administered. The mother will drink and eat as she wishes to maintain natural energy.

We ask that the bag of waters not be artificially broken at any time.

We prefer to labor in one of the hospital’s tubs, if available.

Induction (if medically necessary)

We ask that non-chemical induction methods be tried first. (nipple stimulation, sex, etc) If further help is needed, please try a cervical ripening agent (but not cytotec) rather than pitocin. No pitocin.

Delivery Goals

We prefer not to have an episiotomy unless determined to be medically necessary; we would first like to try perineal massage, support and warm compresses.

We ask that the mother be allowed to try different positions (hands and knees, squatting, birth stools, etc.), if labor or delivery seems stalled.

We ask that the mother be allowed to select her pushing position.

We would like to have the baby placed on the mother's chest immediately after the birth.

We would like to try to have the baby breastfeed as soon as possible, even if delivered by a medically necessary Cesarean.

Newborn Care Goals

Do not administer the eye medication. Do not administer the vitamin K shot until we have spent some time with the baby, preferably as long as possible before leaving the labor and delivery room.

Please delay the weighing and measuring of the baby until the first feeding is complete.

Please do not offer any bottles or pacifiers to the baby without parents' notification of a medical need.

Please discuss routine vaccinations with parents before administering them to the baby.

Do not administer the Hep B vaccination.

__________________________________

So that is it. That was our plan and it went exactly as we wanted. Keep in mind my labor stalled for 3 hours at 9.5 cm (yeah, I go to the hospital at 9.5). MDs probably won't let you go that long--even my midwife was a bit up in arms. And in all honesty, I believe it was Dalia saying, "mommy and daddy, I am just not ready to leave this womb yet. I am not prepared to separate so please give me more time." I also believe it was my body telling everyone that it was not ready. I was not ready to become a mommy. It wasn't the right time.

In the end I did end up letting my midwife break my bag of waters. Funny enough Dalia was being born in the bag of waters (apparently a sign of good luck in Asia). At that moment, I caved, but no regrets there.

Birth is not just a physical task. It is mental, emotional, psychological, physiological, and personal. Your whole self has to be ready to have a baby, not just your cervix!

Flips Flip on Us!

We almost always use wool covers at home and overnight. I have blogged in the past about wool covers and wool maintenance (you with me?). Still, we need the trimness of the thin PUL cover for everyday use.

In wool, Dalia can barely fit into 18 month pants--certainly not with the Baby BeeHinds Wool, but yes with her little-to-bigs. Wool is amazing. I love wool. Wool is necessary for Dalia's overnight diapers. It is breathable, absorbent, natural, and super comfortable.

So recently we have had a problem with our flip covers (pretend you can see my super sad face at this point in my post). They are serious workhorses, cheap, and generally pretty decent quality. BUT the PUL is starting to show serious wear and tear, and they need replacing after 1 year of solid use.

Not bad for a $10 cover, you know?

So 1 year later I am on the hunt to restock our worn diapers. A friend of mine suggested weehuggers. Seriously? What a name... I mean people will buy that cover just because it is called weehuggers! Plus they have adorable prints. Check them out here. So we got Dalia two of these to replace her PUL covers that are no longer doing the trick.

So after all of our trial and error with covers, our stash of current fitting diaper covers includes:

4 little to bigs, snaps

1 thirsties duo, snaps(PUL still works, but the rise is awful on her so we hardly use it)

1 soon to be aristocrat, pull on overnight

2 soon to be weehuggers, aplix

2 baby beehinds, aplix

10 covers total is a good number for cloth diapering families. We didn't include the flips because they aren't working for us anymore. It is just enough for us. The only thing I would add for cold nights is a pair of wool longies. I love wool longies, but they are so pricey. Our beautiful wool does the trick for now, almost exclusively thanks to Dalia's Grammi and Papa.

The world of cloth diapering has been so fun for us. We are very happy that we made the decision 11 months ago to switch.

I will let you know how Weehuggers do when we get them!

Research Released--Ear Infections

Dalia has had one ear infection since she was born. And I have to admit it was a pretty miserable few days. Of course her temp was 103 and she was really really super really cranky (did I make that point clear?). We took her to the doctor and the doctor prescribed antbx. Well, my mommy mind kicked in and I doubted filling the prescription. I doubted it the whole way home. I ended up filling it. Then we debated giving it to her at the table for 20 minutes. Something told me no, but then we decided yes. So we ended up giving it to her (I still feel this was the wrong decision. My friend shared an alternative remedy with me just hours later).

She, of course, developed hives, a sure sign on an allergic reaction. Hmmm... I did tell the doctor that I am allergic (and having a parent that is allergic makes it more likely that the child will be). Needless to say I was annoyed that the doctor didn't prescribe something else just because.

Oh well.

Check this out. I love when research that supports what we feel is correct is released! This has been researched for a long time with similar results, but I like when stuff continues to come out. From DOCTORS, too!

Obviously some infections require anbtx, so always check with you MD or ND :)

Now the alternatives:

Herbal Wellness for Kids (made by Rainbow Light)

Onions and garlic are known to have anti-bacterial properties. Warm onion juice can be used as an eardrop. You can also warm up two garlic cloves in a couple of teaspoons of mustard oil until the oil turns black. Once it is cool, this oil can then be used as a simple home remedy for ear infection.

You can put together two drops of lavender oil, two of chamomile oil, and three drops of tea tree oil in an almond oil solution. Use this mixture, slightly warmed up, as an eardrop three times a day. Chamomile is also known to sooth inflammation, and tea tree oil has well documented anti-microbial properties.

Warm washcloths over the ear can help with pain as well

There are so many ways to deal with ear infections. Do you have any other natural remedies?

Nearing 1 Year of Exclusive Nursing

We are nearing our 1 year mark of exclusive breastfeeding and it feels like such an accomplishment! We have calculated that I have produced about 100 gallons of breastmilk for our baby girl (so far). Now that is a lot of milk. Think of how much money we have saved...

Despite not having a huge breastfeeding and natural childbirth support system (oh, but let me extend a big thank you to my husband, our amazing doula, our midwives, and our bradley teacher), we have managed to have a wonderful year.

It took about 1 month for Dalia to learn how to nurse and for my tatas to produce what she needed. It took about 3 weeks of excruciating pain for my girls to get used to a suckling little baby. Ouch! They say proper latch=no pain at all, but I seriously think that is a lie. I mean someone is tugging on your tata all day and night! One reason I was able to get through the really tough days (and the labor itself) was preparation for pain. My go to person for everything baby and attachment parenting, Dr. Sears, emphasizes preparation as a method of pain management.

Anywho...

Not everyone decides to breastfeed and some people are unable to for medical reasons, but almost everyone can. Our country needs more people who are informed about the benefits of breastfeeding. We need to see more women nursing in public, and we need more people who are educated about breastfeeding. A couple of our doctors at our pedi office nursed for 18 months! Now that is an accomplishment (so is 1 week for those mommies who stopped earlier)!

Many women choose to breastfeed while pregnant. Many women choose to tandem nurse. Whatever your decision is, I think this YouTube video (posted on fb) is fantastic!

ENJOY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcjKeDyTZP8

Natural Healing

With the recent recall of my favorite teething tablets, it truly is the case that nothing (not even the natural stuff) is always 100% safe. Of course the moment the recall happened, thousands and thousands of parents went on-line and to brick and mortars to buy up each and every single container of these miracle pills (natural parenting people, go figure). In fact, many natural parenting parents view the recall as nothing more than the FDA trying to come down on natural remedies for the sake of big pharmas. The "problem" with the pills, according to some, is the inconsistent amounts of belladonna--many docs believe this is nothing to be concerned about.

Side note: Eating 6 bottles may cause a problem. Imagine 1 bottle of Tylenol.

Still I have to admit that I have used them less, if only because Dalia seems less upset by her teething pains. Oh, and because of my recent purchase!

After reading, researching, talking, debating, and doing some general thinking about other teething/discomfort remedies, we decided to purchase a baltic amber teething necklace for Dalia. The jeweler, Inspired by Finn, is an entrepreneur who showcases her products at HyenaCart, one of my favorite on-line shopping destinations.

Read up on amber as a natural healing remedy:

http://hyenacart.com/inspiredbyfinn/index.php?c=63&p=14913

http://www.viewpoints.com/No-Brand-Amber-teething-necklace-review-00b92

http://www.mamapedia.com/article/amber-teething-necklaces

Side note number 2: the above is a quick google search and not my serious research!

Does it work? Who knows.

I will have to let you know, though it may be the placebos talking :)

What is in that Vaccine?!

Gelatin

Fetal Bovine Serum (derived from aborted baby calfs)

Human Diploid Cell (derived from human fetuses in a laboratory setting)

Chick Embryos

These are current ingredients in the MMR vaccine.

Formaldehyde? Yep, that is in the IPV vaccine.

Some kids are exposed to 40 pricks and prods before they turn 2!

Don't believe me? Think this can't be true? Contact your local pharmacy and ask for the ingredient list and then go further and ask your pediatrician for the information on the specific maker of the IPV vaccine they use. Call that company for a full listing of every single ingredient.

In my circle of friends, vaccine talk is one topic of discussion that really gets heated. Most of my friends have opted to follow the alternate vaccination schedule recommended by Dr. Sears. For those of you who aren't familiar with Dr. Sears, take a look at his website and his famous writings on vaccines. Many people do not "jive" with Dr. Sears, but he spoke directly to us. His opinions aren't for everyone (nor should they be). This is information that we find useful and we know that some parents feel the traditional schedule suits them.

It is an individual choice.

This is simply our journey.

Even before Dalia's birth, H and I spent a long time discussing vaccines and did plenty of research. We knew that we definitely did NOT want her to receive the routine eye medication after birth. Some hospitals still use silver nitrate which can burn a baby's eyes. More often than not, hospitals are using Erythromycin instead. While it causes little physical harm to the baby, it does give the baby blurred vision for quite some time, and YES, newborn babies can see right after birth. We knew we wanted our little Dalia to see the two people who helped her make it into this world.

Dalia did not receive the HepB vaccine. We did not want to unnecessarily expose her to possible fever, lethargy, and the inability to suck with gusto in he first days on earth. This vaccine is extremely important if the mommy has HepB or if the family is residing in a part of the world where HepB is more common than not. We do plan on giving Dalia this vaccine later in life when it makes more sense for her. That time is certainly not now.

Most pediatricians recommend administering the IPV (polio) vaccine at 2 months. I gave Dalia her first dose of IPV today at her 10 month appointment. I was pressured like you wouldn't believe. It was a bad situation. This would never happen if we signed up for a practice listed on the Dr. Sears website as vaccine-friendly. Dr. Minkus does generally start the IPV series at the 10 or 12 month appointment, but he listens carefully to concerned parents and then often alters the course of action with empathy.

So what did I do upon returning home? Contact the pharmacy etc etc... I feel disappointed and angry right now. Upset and confused. It will all get better with time, but I just want to know why the orthodox practice of medicine is so stifling, secretive, and rigid.

Being a parent is hard enough, but I just can't let this go! I am a researcher (always have been, thanks mom) and the vaccine world is really unknown to most parents. We assume things are good because the doctors say so, but not all doctors say so!

Even if you give your child every single vaccine, at least research beforehand a little bit and know that the decisions you have made are right for you and your baby.